I just have one question. Why do people keep calling me day and night (and on weekends, too) and say: “I just have one question”? Of course, it could be because they see me on the first page of google’s results for immigration lawyers/attorneys in Cambridge, MA. We are so close, geographically speaking, that picking up the phone and calling me probably feels natural and impersonal, almost like asking a stranger next to you on the train for time. Or it could be because they are considerate and don’t want me to spend my time on actually solving their problem. After all, thanks is the accepted currency for answering a question while the cost of solving a problem usually runs in US dollars. Or it could be that the question is so big and the answer so important that my inconvenience is a small price to pay for the answer that means so much to them and only takes a minute of my time. I really don’t know. What I do know is questions like company and they don’t like being alone. And once asked, they have a tendency to multiply. And multiply. And multiply. Like birds in Alfred Hitchcocks’ movie. Until you start having absurd conversations that you’d rather not have. Such as this one.
— Hello, I want to talk to an immigration lawyer.
— Hello, you are talking to one.
— I just have one question.
— What’s your name?
— I just have one question.
— By the way, how did you find me?
— Oh, you know, on google.
— I see. Are you interested in becoming my client?
— No, I just have one question.
— Are you interested in becoming anyone’s client?
— No, I just have one question.
— I understand. Do you mind getting me a cup of coffee at Starbucks and bringing it to my office?
— A what?
— A coffee. Tall. Cream and sugar.
— Why?
— Because I want one. And I want it now. And if you bring it to me I will answer your question.
— Sorry, I don’t understand.
— Neither do I.